in halves

 Split in a way I never thought would be possible

I have experienced break ups before. I have cried and risen up.

After the storm, what comes is supposedly a calm, but after your storm what came was not exactly it.

I fell I'm split in half and these two parts of me do not complete each other.

Do you have any idea of what you have done to me?

I loved you so deeply, so honestly... I cannot connect with that person who loved you anymore.

I can't let her go either.

You are just a shadow now, a memory and it's so weak.

How come I feel that I'm still holding on in you? How come I feel I'm still waiting somehow for you?

I dreamed three nights in a row with you and woke up lost.

You don't deserve me and you don't even care.

And I'm tired of settling for less. 

I don't want you anymore, and I am not able to want anyone else.

I'm in halves.

Moving on, going forward, but still carrying it with me.

It's a tail stuck in my feet.

I'm going ahead, not looking back, but there's a rope keeping me close enough to still know you were there.

I revived our conversations, I revived all the stuff you have me been through

and I understood all my friends were always trying to alert me of.

And still, here I am, comparing everyone to you.

Comparing everyone to what you were to me.

I'm in halves.

Exhausted of trying to put pieces back together

I gave up the glue and I'm building new ones.

And still, brand new shapes don't seem to fit halves.